How often are you really present when you are with your children?

If you have not had much exposure to Buddhism, one major concept taught is mindfulness meditation. In the simplest of terms, mindfulness refers to attention or awareness of the present moment. The concept may not sound too revolutionary, but you may be quite surprised at just how challenging it is to stay in the present moment. Try it. For the next 60 seconds, try to remain completely in the present moment. Focus only on your breathing without letting your mind wander to anything else… It’s not an easy task is it?

As parents, we are often distracted (if not overwhelmed) by daily responsibilities and worries. All too often, we are not living in the present moment. We may be playing with our children and thinking about something that happened earlier at work. We may be thinking of a waiting task, grocery list, or bills. Our bodies are physically with our children while our minds are far, far away. Somewhere between being monk and being a frantic, scatter-brain, there needs to be a balance.

If you think your child is unaware of your lack of presence, you’re probably wrong. Children thrive on their parent’s full, undivided attention. There is no gift that you can give your child that they will love and appreciate more. Obviously, it is unrealistic for a parent to be fully attentive to their child at all times, but your child doesn’t need that. You should, however, dedicate some focused time with your child each day. Both you and your child will benefit from this time.

Make a concerted effort to give your child 30 minutes of undivided attention each day. Set aside a separate time (away from your child) to spend worrying, daydreaming, or planning. It won’t be easy at first, but you can train your mind – you contol your mind (not the other way around). Admit to yourselft that yes, you do have some things on your mind, but they can wait. For the next 30 minutes, your goal is to give your child the attention they want and need.

Mindfulness and mindfulness meditation can be applied to all aspects of your life. More information on mindfulness can be found here:
Mindfulness in Plain English